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What If the Person Who Named Walkie Talkies Named Everything?

You've probably never thought about how weird the word 'walkie talkie' is until now. Here's what would happen if we named everything like that.

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walkie talkie

Let’s name things like the Walkie Talkie

A few years back, Reddit user dirtknapp asked the Internet: “What would the person who named Walkie Talkies have named other things?” The answers went on for a smiley whiley—and here are our very favourites.

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stabby grabbies walkie talkie

Forks would be…

Does anyone know where the box of plastic stabby grabbies is? I need one for my salad.

Check out these hilarious food jokes!

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soupie scoopies walkie talkie

Spoons would be…

Please stop slurping your meal off of your soupy scoopy.

These funny tweets about food will surely make you smile.

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hairy wearies walkie talkie

Wigs would be…

Grandpa likes to wear a hairy weary for special occasions because he lost all his real hair.

Grammar nerds will definitely appreciate these thesaurus jokes!

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roomy vroomies walkie talkie

Limos would be…

Lots of roomy vroomies pulled up to the church to take the wedding party to the reception.

Could your vocabulary use an update? Steer clear of these old-timey words!

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hearty starty walkie talkie

A defibrillator would be…

Is this building equipped with a hearty starty? For more weird words, check out this collection of bizarre slang from the 1920s!

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starey squaries walkie talkie

Computers would be…

Make sure to bring your starey squaries to lecture today.

You’ll never look at these palindrome words the same way again.

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zoomie boomies walkie talkie

Cruise missiles would be…

We saw lots of antique zoomie boomies at the war museum.

These are the hardest words to spell in the English language.

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heatie eaties walkie talkie

Microwaves would be…

The instructions say to cook it in the heatie eaty for four minutes.

Find out the toughest winning words from the National Spelling Bee.

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wheezy sneezies walkie talkie

Allergies would be…

My wheezy sneezies are always so bad this time of year.

Here are some amazing words we no longer use (but should).

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cattle rattles walkie talkie

Cowbells would be…

Make sure to bring the cattle rattles to the football game so we can cheer on our team.

Take note of these words and phrases that make you sound stupid.

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rightie tightie walkie talkie

Screwdrivers would be…

Is it a Phillips or flat head rightie tighty?

Can you answer these real Jeopardy! questions about words?

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feetie heaties walkie talkie

Socks would be…

One of the best gifts you can give is feetie heaties. Everyone needs them!

Need the laughs to come fast? Check out these short jokes anyone can remember.

Reader's Digest
Originally Published on Reader's Digest