
Astronauts can’t cry
Imagine you’ve been in space for the last 100 earth days and you’re video chatting with your family that you miss dearly—or maybe your wife even had a baby as astronaut Randy Bresnik‘s did while he was orbiting the Earth. If you shed a tear, it won’t roll dramatically down your cheek like it would on Earth. Instead, the tears would form a Jell-o-like blob under your eye because there’s no gravity to pull it down, as explained by Canadian astronaut Chris Hadfield.

Astronauts can’t take a steamy shower…
Or shower at all, for that matter. Water is h-e-a-v-y and expensive to lift outside of Earth’s gravitational field, David Donovan, PhD., physics department head and professor at Northern Michigan University tells Reader’s Digest. “Bathing daily is kind of new world thing. In the past people didn’t do that,” Donovan adds.
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Astronauts can’t use the bathroom the regular way
Us earthlings take many things for granted, including being able to use the bathroom without floating away. Astronauts have to strap into the toilet to ensure everything ends up in the right place. If not, a hilariously embarrassing scenario unfolds: the corralling of the “brown trout,” Donovan spills. This is when astronauts chase down floating human excrement that missed the toilet.

Astronauts can’t consume certain food or drink
In particular, things that are particular. Among bread, foods that can easily break into small parts and cause harm by getting into machinery or the eyes of a surprised astronaut are not allowed. In addition, carbonated drinks are limited because of the pressure differences it can cause, Donovan says.
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Astronauts can’t drink alcohol
Every six days of work in space calls for up to four ounces of sherry, a fortified wine. Or so, that’s what was approved in 1972 for astronauts to enjoy on Skylab missions. This was all fine and dandy until NASA slapped a ban on alcohol due to public outrage over alcohol in space.
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Astronauts can’t write with a regular pen
There’s a gag out there that American’s spent copious amounts of time and effort into creating the illustrious Fisher Space Pen, when the Russians just brought pencils, Donovan says. Nevertheless, the mechanics of the Fisher Space Pen allowed astronauts to write in zero gravity.
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Astronauts can’t sleep in a bed
Instead of pulling the sheets up before sleep, astronauts strap themselves down for the night. When Donovan saw astronaut Jerry Linenger speak at NMU, Linenger said one of the hardest things to readjust to was the pain of laying in bed, because he hadn’t been used to being pushed into the mattress by gravity.

Astronauts can’t hit a golf ball in space
The exception, of course, was astronaut Alan Shepherd; the first American in space, Shepherd was the first to hit golf balls off the moon. “The shot went really long because there’s one-sixth gravity on the moon,” Donovan explains.
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Astronauts can’t take the scenic route
Taking shortcuts is much easier, and more fun, without gravity. On Earth, if you wanted to get to the ceiling in a room, you’d naturally walk over and get a ladder to go up. But space allows you to soar on a diagonal because you’re not restricted, Donovan says.

Astronauts can’t waste
Humans have been in space for about 60 years, and we have a nasty habit of leaving things behind, Donovan says. Similar to plastic oceans, space travellers have inadvertently left a trail of debris known as space junk. “This is, unfortunately, a trait of humans. We think it’s a big place but when you look at all these dots [it’s] becoming problematic because you can hit things on the way up or down,” Donovan says.

Astronauts can’t maintain muscle mass
Our bodies are used to working against gravity, so in space, astronauts lose bone and muscle mass, Donovan explains, but it’s not catastrophic if they don’t run a few laps. This is just one of the misconceptions about NASA. Exercise is built into their everyday routine in order to keep their bodies functioning as they would on Earth.

Astronauts can’t put out a fire the same way
Linenger was on the Mir space station when a fire sparked. His first reaction was to open a window but that’s certainly not possible in space, Donovan says. Instead, astronauts use fire suppression equipment. Donovan explains that in space, fire burns differently because there’s a lack of oxygen.

Astronauts can’t have a normal-looking face…
For the first few days in space, at least. Astronauts tend to get puffier faces in the beginning because there’s no gravity to pull fluid down from the face, Donovan recalls from Linenger’s speech.
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Astronauts can’t sleep without an eye mask
If you thought sleep for astronauts was complicated enough, factor in a sunrise every 90 minutes. That’s one of the reasons astronauts are issued sleep masks to help them get some shuteye.
Next, learn the ways Canadians have contributed to space exploration.