25 Funny Cow Jokes to Lighten Your Moo-d

In need of a good laugh? These legen-dairy cow jokes should do the trick.

Cow Jokes - Grass-Fed CowPhoto: Shutterstock.com / RD.ca

Short Cow Jokes For Rapid-Fire Cow-medy

Q: What do you call a grass-fed cow?
A: A lawn moo-er!

Q: What happens when you talk to a cow?
A: It goes in one ear and out the udder!
—Reddit.com

After the cow jumped over the moon, the other cows said “That’s udderly ridiculous!” and refused to jump. They were grounded beef.
@PuriConsulting

Q: What did the mama cow say to the baby cow?
A: It’s pasture bedtime.
—Buzzfeed.com

Nothing is ever black and white… unless you’re a cow, in which case, you’re both.
@JKruew

Q: What did the cow say to her misbehaving calf?
A: I am not amoosed by you.
—Thoughtcatalog.com

Q: What do you call a cow that just gave birth?
A: De-calf-inated.
virtualedge.org

Cow Jokes - Broke All The TimePhoto: Shutterstock.com / RD.ca

We’re Milking These Cow Jokes For All They’re Worth

Q: What do you get from a pampered cow?
A: Spoiled milk.
@punsandoneliner

Did you see they made round bails of hay illegal in Wisconsin?
It’s because the cows weren’t getting a square meal.
—Buzzfeed.com

The secret service surrounded the president with dozens of cows—they were trying to beef up security.
@MaryFelzkowski

Q: ​​Why are cows always broke?
A: Someone’s always milking them dry.
—Thoughtcatalog.com

I’m looking now but I can’t see the cows at the moment, they must be camooflaged.
@balatacarter

Q: Where do cows get all their medicine?
A: The farmacy.
virtualedge.org

Q: Where do cows eat lunch?
A: In the calf-eteria.
—Thoughtcatalog.com

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Cow Jokes - Herd Em AllPhoto: Shutterstock / RD.ca

Another Round of Legen-Dairy Cow Jokes

Q: What do you call a cow that talks to himself?
A: A solilocow.
@rudecows

Wanted to make a cow joke but you’ve probably herd ’em all.
@rid1tweets

Why was the cow so afraid of messing up?
Because the steaks were high.
—Thoughtcatalog.com

Q: What subjects are a cow’s favourite?
A: Moosic, psycowlogy and cowculus.
@KtizoCrafts

Q: What’s a cow’s favourite holiday?
A: Moo Year’s Eve!
@learnfunnyjokes

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Cow jokes - What do you call a sleeping bull?Photo: Shutterstock.com / RD.ca

The Laughing Stock

Q: Why did the cow win an award?
A: She was out standing in her field.

Q: What’s a cow’s favourite moosical note?
A: Beef-flat!
—Reddit.com

Q: What’s it called when a cow spies on another cow?
A: A steak out.
@beefjerkyexp

Q: What do you call a sleeping bull?
A: A bulldozer.
—Reddit.com

Q: How does a cow get to the moooon?
A: It flies through udder space!
—Reddit.com

Q: What do you get when you cross a cow and duck?
A: Milk and quackers.
@padairymens

If these cow jokes gave you a giggle, don’t miss our countdown of the funniest Canadian jokes of all time.

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