Halloween Jokes Anyone Can Remember!
Q: Why do skeletons have low self-esteem?
A: They have no body to love.
Q: Know why skeletons are so calm?
A: Because nothing gets under their skin.
Q: How do vampires get around on Halloween?
A: On blood vessels.
A Ghost Walks Into a Bar…
Q: Why did the ghost go into the bar?
A: For the Boos.
Q: Why did the Vampire read The New York Times?
A: He heard it had great circulation.
Q: Why did the headless horseman go into business?
A: He wanted to get ahead in life.
Check out more silly jokes to make anyone laugh.
Tricks and Treats
Q: Why do girl ghosts go on diets?
A: So they can keep their ghoulish figures.
Q: Where does a ghost go on vacation?
A: Mali-boo.
Q: What do you call a witch’s garage?
A: A broom closet.
Put your vocabulary to the test with our Halloween words quiz.
Mummy Dearest
Q: Why don’t mummies take time off?
A: They’re afraid to unwind.
Q: Why don’t mummies have friends?
A: They’re too wrapped up in themselves.
Q: What’s a ghoul’s favourite bean?
A: A human bean.
Check out the most haunted places in Canada (if you dare)!
Surreal Estate
Q: What’s it called when a vampire has trouble with his house?
A: A grave problem.
Q: What do you get when you cross a vampire and a snowman?
A: Frostbite
Q: How can you tell when a vampire has been in a bakery?
A: All the jelly has been sucked out of the jelly doughnuts.
Q: What is in a ghost’s nose?
A: Boo-gers
Discover 13 creepy facts about Canada.
Demons Are Forever
Q: Why do demons and ghouls hang out together?
A: Because demons are a ghouls best friend!
Q: Why did the vampire need mouthwash?
A: Because he had bat breath.
Q: What’s it like to be kissed by a vampire?
A: It’s a pain in the neck.
Q: The maker of this product does not want it, the buyer does not use it, and the user does not see it. What is it?
A: A coffin.
After you’ve memorized these Halloween jokes, check out the funniest knock-knock jokes of all time!