These Dad Jokes Are So Bad, They’re Good
No matter how groan-worthy they are, these dad jokes always manage to make us grin.
Ah, bad dad jokes… The pun-filled quips that make every child’s eyes roll, every father’s heart fill with pride and accomplishment, and—now that parents have made their way onto Twitter—the subject of many a tweet. No matter how bad they are, these jokes always manage to get at least a chuckle out of us. Maybe deep down we actually think they’re funny, or perhaps we just love to see our dads smile because they made us laugh. Whatever the reason, here are some of the best dad jokes the Internet can offer. (Don’t forget to check out our funniest knock knock jokes!)
Why don't crabs give to charity?
Because they're shellfish. #dadjokes
— Daddy Poppins (@DaddyPoppinsBlg) April 20, 2017
This story is soda-pressing
I got hit in the head with a can of Diet Coke today.
Don't worry, I'm not hurt.
It was a soft drink.#dadjokes
— Syd Collado (@SydCollado) April 20, 2017
Here comes the bride
Why do melons have weddings?
Because they cantaloupe.#dadjokes
— C&C Geekcast (@CandCGeekcast) April 20, 2017
I rest my case, your honour
Do I enjoy making courthouse puns?
— Bad Dad Jokes (@baddadjokes) March 8, 2017
Get it? Pro-tractor?
I want to go on record that I support farming. As a matter of fact, you could call me:#punfun #dadjokes pic.twitter.com/1UkgR6fuIi
— First Jimothy (@First_Jimothy) May 9, 2017
Confidence is everything
At O&B with Dad. Hostess: 'Do you have reservations?' Dad: 'No. I'm confident I want to eat here.' #dadjokes #ftw
— Sam (@EssaiSam) August 27, 2015
These pets are always on time
Why did the man name his dogs Rolex and Timex? Because they were watch dogs #weekdayjokes #dadjokes
— David F (@DavidFrischling) April 27, 2017
Dress to impress
What's the difference between a poorly dressed man on a tricycle and a well dressed man on a bicycle? Attire. #funny #dadjokes #sahd
— dadstayedhome (@Dadstayedhome) April 27, 2017
Joke of the month(s)
Can February March?
No, but April May.#DadJokes
— BeardedMOGuy (@BeardedMOGuy) April 18, 2017
The road to recovery
I was addicted to the hokey pokey…
But, I turned myself around. ??
— Heather (@RedShiningStar) April 22, 2017
Social media is for the birds
Dad: You know, birds might use Facebook.
Dad: Bc we know they already tweet so… #DadJokes
— Lawkward Lady (@LawkwardLady) April 26, 2017
Fishing for advice
What's the best way to watch a fly fishing tournament?
Live stream.#dadjokes #luredyouin
— Drew Davis (@Drew_Davis86) April 25, 2017
It’s how we all roll
Not sure if you have noticed, but I love bad puns. That's just how eye roll. #punfun #badumtiss #dadjokes
— First Jimothy (@First_Jimothy) April 25, 2017
What about Beethoven?
Did you hear that Arnold Schwarzenegger will be doing a movie about classical music? He'll be Bach. #dadjokes
— Adam Hill (@chilladam) April 23, 2017
What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean?
— Dad Jokes (@GoodOldDadJokes) April 20, 2017
Put that rumour to bed
Dad: Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?
Son: No. What happened?
Dad: The teacher woke him up.#dadjokes
— Ralph Nelson Willett (@NorthernOvation) April 20, 2017
Not so sharp
My kid wants to invent a pencil with an eraser on each end, but I just don't see the point.#DadJokes
— Brian Mork (Hermit) (@hermit_hacker) April 29, 2017
Math is hard
The difference between a numerator and a denominator is a short line.
…..Only a fraction of people will understand this.#dadjokes #math
— Vince Favreaux (@storyofericnjoe) April 28, 2017
Maybe her phone floats
My wife asked me to sync her phone, so I threw it into the ocean. I don't know why she's mad at me. #dadjokes
— Adam Hill (@chilladam) April 26, 2017
My friend keeps saying "Cheer up man it could be worse, u could be stuck underground in a hole full of water"
I know he means well#dadjokes
— Vince Favreaux (@storyofericnjoe) April 25, 2017
And of course, the classic bad dad joke
Son: "Dad, I'm hungry"
Dad: "Hi hungry, I'm Dad"#DadJokes
— Dad Jokes (@fatherlyhumor) December 7, 2016
If you enjoyed these bad dad jokes from Twitter, check out our favourite Father’s Day jokes of all time.